#039

now there’s spring in the air
she had tears inside when
she left-
dissolving, a slit crescendo-

she had forgotten to cry
forgotten how it felt to fail
all that haunted light was
perfection

and, she didnt care
stooping over with ache-

peeling off, un
lacing,

redemption

©Mohana Das

Advertisements

11 thoughts on “#039

  1. Letting go, peeling away, often is the vehicle for redemption–and I love the way you’ve cascaded the images here visually to lay out the meaning–the second stanza, especially is achingly beautiful.

  2. Your endings are always so strong:

    “peeling off, un
    lacing,
    redemption”

    I love the idea of peeling off “un.” (I’m a firm believer in individual lines being separate poems/messages, even if not intended by the writer). For example, I can break up the second stanza in different ways to get different meanings:

    “how it felt to fail all that haunted light”
    OR
    “all that haunted light was”
    OR
    “all that haunted light was perfection”

    “unlacing” could mean taking off shoes, stripping down for a shower after a run (so therapeutic), taking off undergarments and …, or completely tossing out “lace” and all it represents

    In the beginning, were the tears dissolving or was she “dissolving a slit crescendo”? (Both, of course.)

    Is she unlacing redemption, or is unlacing itself a way to achieve redemption? (Both!)

    Love it. And I’ll stop now.

Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out / Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out / Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out / Change )

Google+ photo

You are commenting using your Google+ account. Log Out / Change )

Connecting to %s